why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
