my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
