you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
