i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
