Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
