Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
