Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Randomize