Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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