I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
