did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!