FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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