I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.