i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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