At least make sure they are 18
Why
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
