Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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