whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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