Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.