i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
this will be a night to untag.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
