This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
