So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
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dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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