did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
