just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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