I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
