Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
