so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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