how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
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