why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
