I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
where does the pee come out of this thing
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
