i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
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