so explain again why im purple
no
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
