So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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