i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
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Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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