I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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