just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize