Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize