Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
