She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I think people are normalizing furries
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
