take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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