He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize