as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
