i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
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