Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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