don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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