dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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