I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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