it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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