you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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