I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
