I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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