Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
it's like iHOP with fire
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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