final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize