Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
